The Naked Jade Carver

Our Lil’ Trooper Does It Again!!!

Naked Jade 'Chipper' After Extensive Cosmetic Surgery

Six days of Grueling Surgery later – he survives. In these modern days of wondrous ‘miracle cures’ and ’surgical wonders’, we as a people, I believe, have become ‘hardened’ to the point where we just don’t ’see’ or ‘feel’ the “True Wonder” of the ‘Surgical Magicians’ feats. Under the almost Other-Worldly, Mystical Powers of the great minor master carver “The Mage”, and under the Supreme Tutelage of the Greatest Jade and Jadeite Carver the world has ever known – “The Naked Jade Carver”, this most fantastic performance of mystical skill took place. The tremendous skills of the finely dressed, young, pretty and talented  lady anesthetist were reported to be a wonder of their own, as with just the most minor wrong turn of a dial our amazing lil’ Wyoming Black Nephritic Hero – The Naked Jade could be out dancing with the angels in Stone Heaven. How can we even fathom the intense concentration and utter dedication-to-task undertaken by the two Master Craftsmen as they spent literally days at their mission of transformation, with only the finest imported Columbian coffee and perfect little catered sandwich wedges (with no crust) to sustain their almost inhuman efforts while life hung so delicately in the balance?

Relaxing In The Mage's Garden After Surgery

It has been reported that the National Guard had to be called in to control the fevered crowds that had gathered for the entire vigil in a make-shift tent city hastily erected  for the masses, as the chanting for both the Master Jade Artists and the Naked Jade rose to a feverish pitch. Over one ton of special, sterilized surgical towels were said to have used during the operation just to wipe the fevered brows of the Two Master Carvers by the hand picked, rather buxom surgical assistants, while Stephanie, the Mage’s wife, watched on through the special viewing windows of the Palatial Surgical Facility during the entire proceedings, to make sure none of these ‘beauties’ got too ‘familiar’ with the great minor master, The Mage. The Naked Jade Carver, in his usual controlled and mystical fashion, took no notice of the surroundings, but focused his near magical perceptions on the task at hand, as just one minor slip of the ‘grinder’ could have severed a ‘healed fracture’ and sent the entire surgical proceedings into an uncontrollable tailspin. Through the many prayers of the surgical participants and the chanting of Kumbaya’s from outside the Surgical Palace, everything went according to the “Higher Powers” plans as our Naked Jade merely shrugged upon being revived and was reported to have asked for a cold lager draft.

Naked Jade Taking In the Boston Harbor at Daybreak