The Naked Jade Carver

The Gala Event Of The Season Expected To Be Attended By The Rich & Famous

Naked Jade Kissing John Harvard’s Toe For Luck Before His Lecture

This wonderful photo was shot by an unknown photographer “catching” our Naked Jade just before his Famous Lecture to the Elite of Eastern Society to be followed by his Crowning of “Nephritic Spokesman of the Year” at the Gala dinner thrown in his honor by all the “Upper-Crust”, Famous Actors and Actresses, Heads of State and Ambassadors from Abroad!!  One such Famous personage was overheard stating “It well could be the Event of the Century”.

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Naked Jade Overlooks The Dining Hall for Tonight's Special Event

 Asked by our News team if he was in the least nervous about lecturing in front of such “High Status” and Royalty our lil’ hero just shrugged and remarked in his typical heartland style, “It ain’t nothin’ but a thang’. Such raw courage, such a confident demeanor, such a spokesman for the worlds of Jade and Jadeite – the Creative Masters which work with the “Worlds Toughest Stone” and the Master of all Jade Artists in the world – “The Naked Jade Carver”. All this by a truly American Icon of Stone and with the newest, most dangerous cosmetic surgery just days away to be performed by one of the greatest minor masters in all the world, “The Mage”, one wonders how such a small nephritic stone, from such humble beginnings could reach such heights of adoration.

Naked Jade Testing Acoustics in The Lecture Hall

While it always seems our Hero – The Naked Jade gets all of the attention, The Master of all Jade Carvers – The Naked Jade Carver himself and his newest understudy The Mage will attending the festivities but in a more demure manner. It has been reported they will both be taking their dinners in private at the famous Harvard School of Medicine while studying the X-rays and going over the anatomy charts of the Naked Jade before the up-coming surgery on our brave hero – a True American Icon.